Looking down at herself, she shook her head, then returned Female Model to her ministrations with a sigh. &Female Model quot;But I fear I was as tall Female Model as I am today on my fourteenth naming day. All knees and elbows, like a colt that grew too fast. And not long after I could walk across a room without tripping twice, I learned-" She drew a deep breath. "-learned my life would take me another, way Female Model than being a merchant. And now that Female Model is gone, too. About time I put to use what I was taught all Female Model those years ago. Under the circumstances, I . can't think of a better time or place.&Female Model quot;
Siuan studied her shrewdly a moment more. "That isn't the reason. Not Female Model the whole reason. Out with it."
Hurling a small brush into the box, Leane blazed up in a fury. "The whole reason? I do not know Female Model the Female Model whole reason. I only know I need something in' my life to replace-what is gone. You yourself told me that is Female Model the only hope of surviving. Revenge falls short, for me. I know your cause is necessary, and perhaps even, Female Model right, but the Light help me, that is not enough Female Model either; I can't make myself be as involved as Female Model you. Maybe I came
too Female Model late to it. I will stay with you, but it isn't enough."
Anger faded as she began resealing pots and vials and replacing them, though she used more force than was strictly necessary. There was the merest hint of rose scent about her. "I know flirting isn't something to fill up the emptiness, but it is enough to fill an idle moment. Maybe being who I was born to be will suffice. I
just do not know. This isn't a new idea; I always wanted to be like my mother and my aunts, daydreamed of it sometimes after I was grown."
Leane's face became pensive, and the last things went into the box more gently. "Female Model I think perhaps I've always felt I Female Model was masquerading as someone else, 'building up a mask until it became second nature. There was serious work to be done, more serious than merchanting, and by the time I realized there was another way I could have gone even so, Female Model I had the mask on Female Model too firmly to take off. Well, that Female Model is done with, now, and the mask is coming off. Female Model I even considered beginning with Logain a week ago, for practice. But Female Model I am out of practice, and I think he is the kind of man Female Model who might hear more promises than you meant to offer, and expect Female Model to have them Female Model fulfilled." A small smile Female Model suddenly appeared on her lips. "My mother always said if that happened, you Female Model had miscalculated Female Model badly; if there was no back way out, you had to either abandon dignity and run, or pay the price